Birth Story (Part 3) Finally!

WARNING: LOOOOOONNNNGGGG Post! Lots of pictures and writing, and lots of me looking like I got hit by a truck :) But thats okay, I had twins and it was what it was :)

The rest of the story has no more of Luke's journaling... things got exciting and real and no time for writing down the details I suppose. So I will do my best to recall the day's events...
First we found some pics that should have been posted in part one of the birth story...

From the time they had called Dr.Johnson when I was at 8 cm until the time Dr.Johnson arrived, I progressed to 10 cm. This really blew my mind as I didn't imagine I would progress that fast, especially having it be my first delivery. From the time I was started on Pitocin at 10am and was at 3 cm, it only took 5 hours for me to get to 10cm at 3pm, with zero pain or anything! I was thrilled that it was time to push and really couldn't believe what was about to happen. I knew I was getting so close to meeting my babies but I knew I had some work ahead of me and really had no idea what to expect. When delivering twins, you labor in a normal labor and delivery room but then when it is time to deliver, you have to move into the O.R. to push. Dr. Johnson came in and wanted to have me push for a while in the labor and delivery room, and as it got closer, go ahead and wheel me into the O.R. My husband, mom, and sister in law were all surrounding me and when doctor Johnson came in the room, we all held hands and prayed for the safety of me and for the safe delivery of our babies. I was so thankful to hand everything over to the Lord, and it was so great to be surrounded by all my favorite people. The next 15 mins or so I spent pushing. They didn't have me use the stirrups... I just remember them holding my legs as I pushed my chin into my chest and pushed with EVERYTHING I had. With my belly being so large it was hard to really use my body to push into itself and I that first pushing session was so difficult as I felt like I had no idea what I was doing or if what I was doing was right. I told my doctor that I really couldn't feel what I was doing because I was so numb from my epidural and I really could feel any contractions to push through. He wanted to turn my epidural down and come back in 30 mins to try and push again. As he left the room and my epidural was turned down, I started to feel the contractions much stronger. It wasn't bad, just very crampy feeling. The 3o mins passed and I started to really feel the urge to push. Everything was so laid back... I remember Dr. Johnson sitting at the end of my bed with his hand inside me, feeling Hadley's head and moving things around as I was pushing. I don't know if he was trying to feel for something in specific or if he was trying to help her get into position for delivery. Every time I could feel a contraction coming on, they instructed me to push. I remember my mom doing all the counting out loud, sweet Ashley feeding me ice chips on my breaks, and I remember Luke just watching and being kind of quiet... what he does in intense situations. The pain started getting really intense. Each contraction began getting stronger and more painful as I pushed through them with all my might. I was teary and a bit irritable but I would imagine all my family would say I remained pretty friendly even in my intense moments. I kept pushing and no one was saying much. They were being encouraging but no one was saying "oh I can see the head!" or "You are almost there." I felt like I was giving it all I had and nothing was happening. Here is where the bummer comes in... Everytime I would push, the wire from Hadley's scalp electrode would come out of me and things were looking great, but as soon as I stopped the push, she went right back up. I didn't know this was happening because no one was saying anything in fear of discouraging me. Dr. Johnson gave me another 30 min break and we pushed one last session before he said what I was dreading to hear. I wasn't expecting it AT ALL... I thought I would just be pushing for a while but Dr. Johnson said, "she is just not coming down, we can try to push a while longer but I think we are going to have to do C-section" I asked him if he thought pushing more would do the trick and he said he thought the babies were tangled together and he was going to call this "failure to descend" and that a C-section would be the best choice at this point. I began to cry. I couldn't believe this was happening, I thought for sure I would achieve the vaginal birth I so badly wanted but I knew Dr.Johnson had only sectioned two sets of twins ever, all the rest were vaginal, so if he was telling me a C-section was needed, I knew that it was needed...plus, I was trying with ALL my might, and if it wasn't working, nothing I could could change the outcome. 

I was tearful and the pain was intense, with every contraction, the pressure was unreal and I felt like my mind was spinning. They told Luke to scrub up and that only he was allowed in the O.R with me. I heard them telling my family how long it would take and that they needed to go prep the O.R. 
At this point, I just kept my eyes closed the entire time to get through the pain, and to cope with the fact I was about to have major surgery that I really hadn't prepared myself for. I honestly don't remember a whole lot. I remember them wheeling me into the O.R. and the BRIGHT lights that were shining on me. I remember them moving me onto the table and I remember seeing Brandy, my nurse anesthetist once again. The last time I saw her she was putting my epidural in, and now she was going to medicate me through my epidural for SURGERY! She talked to me lots and as the medicine went in my line I began to feel very very out of it. The rest of my surgery I felt pretty snowed which was probably good to get my mind through it all, as I saw a brutal C-section in nursing school. I had seen open heart surgery and didn't flinch but the C-section made me want to pass out! 
I could feel Dr.Johnson pushing on my belly deciding where he wanted to cut. I told him I could feel that, and he then poked me with a sharp instrument and asked me if it hurt, it didn't so I assumed I would just feel lots of "pressure" through out, and that I did! There was lots of pressure that was uncomfortable but definitely bearable! I could feel heat of them cutting me and other creepy sensations and the worst part was how drugged up I felt. I was trying so hard to stay awake but I was just SO VERY GROGGY. I don't remember everything vividly, but I will never forget the sensation of them pulling each baby out and hearing their precious cries. I immediately wept when I heard those cries. They took both babes away immediately to assess them and Luke went over to check everything out. I was trying to keep my eyes open but was SO sleepy, he came over to me and told me how beautiful and perfect they were. I asked who they looked like and he said he didn't know (how is this possible? as SOON as I saw Jack Henry, I couldn't believe how much they looked alike) Then after they were initially assessed (got APGARs of 8 and 9 and 9 and 10) Luke brought them over to me. He was holding both of them while I was still be stitched up and I COULD NOT BELIEVE how beautiful and perfect they were. I thanked Jesus and was just in AWE! Once they finished with me, they transfered me to a regular bed and let me hold both of my babies. They immediately wheeled me to the recovery room with both babes in hand, with Luke following behind. We entered the room and began to breastfeed each baby while the other was getting their bath. I literally thought my heart was going to EXPLODE. I had never known a love like this and bonding with each of them and putting them to my breast to feed wa just the most incredible thing ever. My parents came in to meet them first with tears in their eyes meeting their first grandchildren... in awe. Then Ashley came in to meet them and we told her Hadley was Hadley Quinn Ashley. Their one and only Aunt meeting them just 5 short weeks after she lost her husband. God orchestrated things beautifully, but so very bitter sweet and then Luke's parents came to meet them, following my Aunt and cousin Grace Anne. We spend the rest of the night just soaking in every moment, and I believe that is where I needed to catch up to, to THIS.
I can only credit God for their beautiful creation and the GOODNESS that is raising babies. Thank you my sweet Lord for giving me a love that mirrors your love for Jesus and entrusting me with these sweet and precious babes, to you I give the glory. 

Thank you Lord for my precious babies.