Where I am right now... Well, I am on the couch, fire going, all three kiddos in bed, Kentucky basketball game on and scrolling around on my laptop while my husband is practicing his sermon (in our closet) Its a good place to be, but where I am IN LIFE right now is so very good as well.
The past 24 hours have been so very sweet. Last night Luke and I hired a babysitter and were able to enjoy a night out. It was so much better than any date we could plan though. My sweet hubby bought us tickets (he was so sweet to pick up on me saying I would like to go a few months ago, and went ahead and bought them. Isn't it so sweet when you know they are listening to the little details of your heart?) to a Bethel music night. I could go on and on about it, but if you aren't familiar with Bethel Music, look them up. They tour around worshipping God in different cities and grew from a church in California. They are WORSHIPFUL, worshipping our creator with so much love, praise and passion. It does the soul so well to be in his presence, led with such excellence, just praising him so intimately. There is no greater place to be than in His presence, and His presence was so strong last night. We heard amazing words from the leaders and lifted our hearts in praise, and lifted them together, which is a real treat since I never really get to worship with my husband, being a pastor's wife, since he is always working while we are at church. It was refreshing and encouraging and left me wanting more of the Lord, which is always a good place to be.
Sweet Luke also took our family for a day trip to Waco today. He is not usually off on Wednesdays but I asked him next time he was, if we could go to Magnolia Market. If you aren't familiar with it, do your self a favor, turn on HGTV and watch Fixer upper. I could go on and on, but just do it and then you will save me lots of words, and will understand why it MADE MY WEEK. I would show you pics of my 2 purchases today but that would require me to upload all my photos and remember, I'm on my couch, and it is quiet, and I am doing really good to type right now :)
But really WHERE I AM.....
I am in the process of fighting a battle, gripping a strong hold and gaining control over a huge battle in my life... my relationship with food. If you have been a long time reader, you would know I lost almost 40 lbs before conceiving the twins (search under nutrition I think) because I wanted to be IN CONTROL of my eating that had spiraled out of control as a late teen and I wanted to be healthy and ready for pregnancy and to battle my PCOS diagnoses. If I could sum up the seasons of my life with food here they'd be...
age 17-23 Started gaining weight when I could drive and make my own choices. Binged on food, self sabotaged, NO working out, and totally overwhelmed.
2011- Joined weight watchers lost all my weight in about 9 months and in the process understood concept of clean eating. LIFE changer. Totally free from food and so happy.
Twins pregnancy- Ate well, treated myself more but still really healthy and in control.
Nursing twins- Could get away with murder as far as what I could eat, and so I did and remained my tiniest weight the whole time I nursed.
Post Nursing twins- I had gained 10 lbs after weaning them but started a new love for long distance running, and ate really well, and maintained a great weight and overall healthy relationship with food.
Walker's pregnancy- My first trimester I had several weeks of feeling yuck... this pushed me to carbs and sugar and bam, I fell off the wagon and never really recovered.
Nursing Walker- the most challenging season. Newly autoimmune diagnosis (more on this later) Low milk supply, making working out really difficult and my motivation for eating well was so not there. I got put on steroids and suddenly my 7 lbs of baby weight turned into 20.
Which is where I found myself now...
NO MORE. I was so unhappy with my weight and more unhappy with how I was doing mentally with food. Binging on sugar and then hating myself later and then repeating the process. I knew only God could give me strength to change and I was ready to change. I know that SO MUCH of how I am doing spiritually is directly related to my stronghold, which mine happens to be food. I was ready to gain control and grow closer to God in the process. I had toyed around with the idea of whole 30 before and decided this was the time to do it. I am doing it with my mom and sister in love and it has been AMAZING ya'll, like I am pretty sure, life changing. I will do a whole post on this when I am complete, but right now I am on day 17/30 and feel SO MUCH more in control of my eating. It hasn't been easy but after the first week, much easier. So I can't wait to share more about the whole 30, share my results and blog on way more things, updates on Walker, our family and my walk with the Lord in general. As always, I pray this brings you some encouragement friends. If you struggle with food pr whatever stronghold you have, know you are not alone. We are all walking these hard journeys.
Well, thats it for now. Going to watch more Making a Murderer on Netflix with my hubs. We just finished all 5 seasons of Downton Abbey in a row and dang friends, it is GOOD. I pray whereever you are in life, you are seeking more of Him. Love to you all!